LIVE: Drunkblogging the Iowa Caucuses

If you need a rundown on how tonight’s caucuses are supposed to function, before the infinite number of monkeys with their infinite number of wrenches go to work on the process, I have that for you up here. It’s a nifty primer to help you understand the Iowa caucuses without having to think very much.

You’re welcome, America.

To give you an idea of what the stakes are, here’s fellow swiller Jim Geraghty:

Clearly, the nominee won’t be decided tonight. What is at stake is bragging rights, the appearance of momentum, and a chance to prove which candidate can connect with grassroots voters. All of these are a Big Deal going into New Hampshire, and especially the expensive delegate-rich states that actually will pick the winner.

Unless the DNC puts its thumb on the scale to deny a Sanders candidacy.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

The liveblog should autorefresh, so you won’t need to hit the Reload button to get the latest info. It’s better that way, because reloading the whole page taxes our server, and we still haven’t sprung for the 8meg memory upgrade on the trust PJM Amiga 500.

I have the Decision Desk supergeniuses on hand. I have C-SPAN. I have a bucket of ice, a bottle of Bombay Sapphire, a peeled lime, and a dry vermouth.

That’s as ready as I know how to be, so if you’re ready, too…

…shall we begin?

UPDATE: Amazing Managing Editor Paula Bolyard got the DDHQ widget working, so I’ll keep their numbers here at the top of the page for you. Snark will follow below in the usual manner.

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